when it rains, it pours. that was what happened these few days.
here's how i got drenched in a nut shell.
went for industrial and orgnanizational psychology lecture. my self-esteem took another beating by my sheer stupidity and difficulty in trying to comprehend why the hell i was doing there.
went to the library to borrow books. found out i incurred a fine of 48 dollars. apparently the book i borrowed, was a one-week rbr loan book. the world is flat. read the intro, decided to buy the original, left it on my table and forgot about it. dropped it off at the machine in the middle of the night. then bam. 48 dollars. the fine was a dollar an hour, and not fifty cents a day as per normal shelf books. now decided not the buy the orginial which costs 40 dollars by the way.
did not do any research at all for a meeting scheduled today for a presentation scheduled tuesday. felt very depressed.
depressed not because so much because i had to pay 48 dollars, but because i had been so careless. but was glad for kind listeners who would just listen and try to comfort me, although all i really wanted for for someone to listen silently, because i already knew what was to be done, just needed to let my frustrations out.
and so went for training. din really feel it was good. something was wrong, with my stroke, with the atmosphere, with the boat. i dunno. could not really put my finger on it. maybe it was just me. i was the something wrong, being so caught up in wallowing in my inner agony.
and so, studied till 130, slept at 2, woke up at 830. intended to rush to library to settle the fine and do my research. found out how to borrow current journals today (after so long). took out 2 books hoping to borrow them out. put them in my bag having reminded myself to check them out as i was about to leave. went to photocopy some rbr articles. and then only thinking of where i was going to settle down and read the articles, simply waltzed out of the library with 2 unchecked books in my bag. and so i set off the alarm, got so pissed with myself, mumbled some expletives targeting myself, and was given a warning letter. i committed a crime. its called grand theft. embarrassed, upset, angry, i marched back in to get them checked and decided to just come back to the room. so much for thinking of being efficient and effective.
and so here i am, tired, exhausted, wanting to sleeping, hoping to read, having a tutorial in 1 hours time. and blogging. wow. great. wonderful. the "4.8" that i so hopefully printed at the beginning of this sem stares at me as it seems to be fading out.
its a sunny day, but i am soaked.
here's how i got drenched in a nut shell.
went for industrial and orgnanizational psychology lecture. my self-esteem took another beating by my sheer stupidity and difficulty in trying to comprehend why the hell i was doing there.
went to the library to borrow books. found out i incurred a fine of 48 dollars. apparently the book i borrowed, was a one-week rbr loan book. the world is flat. read the intro, decided to buy the original, left it on my table and forgot about it. dropped it off at the machine in the middle of the night. then bam. 48 dollars. the fine was a dollar an hour, and not fifty cents a day as per normal shelf books. now decided not the buy the orginial which costs 40 dollars by the way.
did not do any research at all for a meeting scheduled today for a presentation scheduled tuesday. felt very depressed.
depressed not because so much because i had to pay 48 dollars, but because i had been so careless. but was glad for kind listeners who would just listen and try to comfort me, although all i really wanted for for someone to listen silently, because i already knew what was to be done, just needed to let my frustrations out.
and so went for training. din really feel it was good. something was wrong, with my stroke, with the atmosphere, with the boat. i dunno. could not really put my finger on it. maybe it was just me. i was the something wrong, being so caught up in wallowing in my inner agony.
and so, studied till 130, slept at 2, woke up at 830. intended to rush to library to settle the fine and do my research. found out how to borrow current journals today (after so long). took out 2 books hoping to borrow them out. put them in my bag having reminded myself to check them out as i was about to leave. went to photocopy some rbr articles. and then only thinking of where i was going to settle down and read the articles, simply waltzed out of the library with 2 unchecked books in my bag. and so i set off the alarm, got so pissed with myself, mumbled some expletives targeting myself, and was given a warning letter. i committed a crime. its called grand theft. embarrassed, upset, angry, i marched back in to get them checked and decided to just come back to the room. so much for thinking of being efficient and effective.
and so here i am, tired, exhausted, wanting to sleeping, hoping to read, having a tutorial in 1 hours time. and blogging. wow. great. wonderful. the "4.8" that i so hopefully printed at the beginning of this sem stares at me as it seems to be fading out.
its a sunny day, but i am soaked.