hey peepz.
its time i did a little updating just to let all of you know i am still alive, although barely.
i just had a competition, MR500 at seletar resevoir over the weekend. the team, both the guys and the girls did reasonably well, one gold, two silvers, one bronze, one fourth, one plate first. ah well.
i was part of the bronze, fourth and the plate. think i rowed till i almost died. literally. rowed in 7 races on sunday. i barely had the time to lie on the grass, have my cap over my head, have my mp3 in my ears and just tune out. go down, row, come up, warm down, warm up, go down and row again.
shack? most definitely. but i was glad i had some motivation.
it was a competition with mixed feelings for me. for various various reasons. haha! most of them selfish ones, as usual. (i should take every opportunity to impress upon my readers that i am selfish. haha!) someone said to find a reason why we are all still in the team. i have a reason, but not one that has been strong enough for me. so am i still searching? perhaps. and yet, i may have silently, left the search aside, as i busy myself with academics.
i am not one of much hope for many things. perhaps, least of all, for people. faith, hope, belief. they are still a little beyond my grasp. a little beyond my comprehension. however, that's not to say i do not have any of them.
i am still grateful for a lot of things in life. my family, my friends, and certain especially special people that have crossed my path. i am sorry if i have neglected all of you. i have been rather, preoccupied. hehe.
there are things that have become a little clearer for me. and there are objectives i have decided to undertake to achieve them. and along the way, some things will inevitably be sacrificed, neglected, forgotten. i cannot be greedy. and i cannot give false hopes. i do not seek recognition, i do not seek remembrance, i do not seek others' hopes, dreams and expectations. because i am afraid i would unintentionally fail them all, as i try to fulfill my own dreams.
there are things i was striving for, but now, things have changed. and things will continue to change. the flux is ever fluid, and i must be flexible, lest i bend and break. i must be ready to let everything go at once, only so that i can pick up the necessary pieces.
am i being esoteric? perhaps. but it just means i should just go and bathe and head on to the 24 hour YIH to begin another step at another stab at another futile attempt at 5.0.
be still my heart.
its time i did a little updating just to let all of you know i am still alive, although barely.
i just had a competition, MR500 at seletar resevoir over the weekend. the team, both the guys and the girls did reasonably well, one gold, two silvers, one bronze, one fourth, one plate first. ah well.
i was part of the bronze, fourth and the plate. think i rowed till i almost died. literally. rowed in 7 races on sunday. i barely had the time to lie on the grass, have my cap over my head, have my mp3 in my ears and just tune out. go down, row, come up, warm down, warm up, go down and row again.
shack? most definitely. but i was glad i had some motivation.
it was a competition with mixed feelings for me. for various various reasons. haha! most of them selfish ones, as usual. (i should take every opportunity to impress upon my readers that i am selfish. haha!) someone said to find a reason why we are all still in the team. i have a reason, but not one that has been strong enough for me. so am i still searching? perhaps. and yet, i may have silently, left the search aside, as i busy myself with academics.
i am not one of much hope for many things. perhaps, least of all, for people. faith, hope, belief. they are still a little beyond my grasp. a little beyond my comprehension. however, that's not to say i do not have any of them.
i am still grateful for a lot of things in life. my family, my friends, and certain especially special people that have crossed my path. i am sorry if i have neglected all of you. i have been rather, preoccupied. hehe.
there are things that have become a little clearer for me. and there are objectives i have decided to undertake to achieve them. and along the way, some things will inevitably be sacrificed, neglected, forgotten. i cannot be greedy. and i cannot give false hopes. i do not seek recognition, i do not seek remembrance, i do not seek others' hopes, dreams and expectations. because i am afraid i would unintentionally fail them all, as i try to fulfill my own dreams.
there are things i was striving for, but now, things have changed. and things will continue to change. the flux is ever fluid, and i must be flexible, lest i bend and break. i must be ready to let everything go at once, only so that i can pick up the necessary pieces.
am i being esoteric? perhaps. but it just means i should just go and bathe and head on to the 24 hour YIH to begin another step at another stab at another futile attempt at 5.0.
be still my heart.
i pray for health for my friend.
take care. :)