ganbatene, baka inu
decided to blog and expurge inner frustration before i set off on another long trek into the centre of the world of utter desolation called books.

first. i was very irritated by my mom. you see, my mom works in this pharmateutical company called Baxter. it is an american company and was rich enough to hand out scholarships and bursaries for the children of the employees. so one day, my sister came up to me in school and asked me to fill in application form. i was very surprised. at first i did not know what it was. but when i realise it was a form for a scholarship, i was already quite irritated. i have filled up such forms before in a vain attempt to convince high flyers that run big MNCs that my 'A' level grades of AABB, and my lacklustre cca record was worth that 10 seconds of their time to even look at the fom. And all these forms individually need 1 to 2 hours of filling up/justification/essay writing just to get completed. and this form from my mother was of no exception. so i hastily filled up the form half-heartedly. mind you, i only filled up the blanks that required direct information like my name and address. there was this part which asked me questions like "what exceptional events have influenced you... blah blah blah." and i gave it back.
then today, my mom called again and insisted that i fill up another form because i had 'doctor's handwriting' and i needed an appraisal. an APPRAISAL???!!!! ie. that means i need to get an NUS lecturer to write a report saying what a wonderful student i am. question. how many lecturers teach you directly? me? 2 so far who bothers to remember my name. 1 is mr nerney (refer to my previous blog on how i hate him) and 2 my physics tutor (refer to my previous blog on how i hate him too). so there. 2 tutors who know me by name simply because i was a terrible student. how am i supposed to get an appraisal? i detest even to ask them for anything. furthermore, i have no time and have no intention of making the time to approach them personally to request for this. and when i tried persuading my mom how i am not able to get an appraisal, she insisted that i try. "mom, i have bad grades." "go try." "no lecturer is going to give me an appraisal." "go try." "mom, i dun want to do this." "go and try." ARGH! i was at the photocopying room in the central library. i think i attracted a lot of attention. i was so pissed. but its my mom. my energy was so drained. i just sulked and agreed to everything that she was telling me. "just ask your professor. must try. dun say you dun want to try. dun say you dun have time."

have your parents forced you to do things that you never liked doing? probably a billion times. have you argued with your parents over things you refuse to do? probably another billion times.
i am probably going to have to go through this one more time.
i am going to hell for being the unfilial son that i am.

second. went to the diam chrysler workshop today. cool place. hydrogen fuel cell cars. learnt alot today. maybe by the time i can afford a car, i might want to consider this. right now, hydrogen fuel sells at $25 per kg. the car runs 120km on 1.8kg. mel says travelling from bedok to clementi and back is 120km. how much do you have to pay per day? go figure. the guy at the workshop says that hydrogen fuel cell cars will probably substitute petroleum-run cars when fuel prices are as high. i was thinking, when they become that high, i would not even bother about getting one at all.

three. typed a long paragraph bitching about my physics tutor. decided to take it off. dun want to bitch no more.

four. training is tough. i have to date 5 blisters, 2 gashes and one almost broken thumb because i hit the gunrail one too many times. going to do the same thing, if not tougher again tomorrow. pray that i live to finish my assignments. oh but i cant really complain, PQ's ones are worst. you should see it. he describes his blisters as "juicy". and yes, they look like juicy peaches. only, that you dun want to bite into them.

five. i want to say again, that its not that i dun like the flower that julianna gave me. its just that the fact that someone would give me a flower because she was on a dare, just made me feel such a loser. that i could only get something in that context. but i like the flower, cos if there's anything to feel comfortable about, at least i got a flower right? i hung it to dry in my room. I mean, its nice that julianna could approach me even if on a dare. it means i am approachable right? haha!! nice enough at least, right? it means i am not a gone case right? i think, when PQ reads this, he is going to tell me not to delude myself. haha!!!
on a more macabre note, it reminds me of beauty and the beast, waiting for that kiss before the last petal drops, waiting for her before i die. haha!!! how romantic.
1 Response
  1. GM Says:

    yo...finally updated for me to suan pple.

    1) you are a mama's boy
    2) you are a whiner
    3) market also got sell a lot of flowers, go buy one urself
    4) remember my 10 point rule, u will get a chiobu. hahaha...
    5) on a more serious note...you never know wat may happen...I know of one with scholarship with grades of AAB in A'levels. He is now in Imperial College in UK.
    6) Fight on. Me, the chairman of NUSDB supporters/bailer/drummer club will be behind u.

    GM