the unofficial word for the day: cognitive dissonance.

had this question for psychology exam. got it wrong. i am doomed. doomed. doomed. my life has crumbled. i want to die. yet i still live. why? cognitive dissonance. ah well.

anyway. i am slacking. huh? sigh. incoherence rules the day. word salad. i suspect schizophrenia. right now, i need dissociative amnesia. i will never classical or operant learn the rules of social perception. but who cares. the exam has ended. bipolar disorder coming up. i think i need to become some obessive compulsive freak frightened that the lack of actylcholine will one day lead me to alzheimers. its okay. i will die alone in the depths of IMH anyway.

while alex got a yan yan mugger mug. i lost my own mug. sigh. left it on the bus. talk about absent mindedness, talk about drifting consciousness, talk about encoding failure. got the response of sadness, think will develop a phobia for buses now. i need behavior modification. i need anti depressants, prozac that induces more seratonin into the brain dead mind of a bread dead freak. now i am stereotyping against all those who did not help me, all those who stop short at the second stage of the decision making model of bystander intervention. guess i am not a lady in mini skirt. that will get me some help. think i need to form an in group and then an out group to vent all my frustrations. the realist conflict theory. i am so dead. i am so screwed.

i really need to get out psychology mood now, and transit to maths and science and ps. i mean what is the probability of the second law of thermodynamics not being right? if not, than the world has been created by an almighty god. but if there was, why are there so many wars on the face of the earth, where foreign policy and diplomacy have failed to be successful enough tools? account for their failures. use contemporary examples where approporiate. 30 marks. wah gone. gone. gone.

when we need to look into the past, the meaning and significance of past events have a big bearing on where we are now. its good to remember about the past. but if the past gets too clingy, we cannot move forward. when the present gets to burdensome, the future moves on without us. its never too good to look to far ahead of the future, cos we dun exist in that point of time, at least not that far ahead. what is lost is lost. what is to come will come. accept that fact of life. accept it with the dignity of a human being. a human being with the reason to see that happiness does not exist when the status quo has deteriorated into agony, into misery, into a mess of troubling times. a human being with the magnimity to let go of a situation that inflicts nothing but pain. a human being with the decency to see that what is now, is wrong, and needs some form of change, needs some form of resolution, needs some form of salvation.

my salvation will come in the form of god. when he has been here all along, i think it may be time to seek his warm embrace.

i think i have gone off tangent, if i were ever on the right path in the first place. i wanted to sleep, yet i am blogging. cognitive dissonance. self fulfilling prophecies do come true.

nightz!