ganbatene, baka inu
i am really feeling like breaking down now. today i just finished that damn paper 2 essay. and at the end of it all, i dun feel secure. i have that nagging feeling its going to come back bad. i was sitting there and i visualised a C+ and my mind screamed in pain. i was so scared. what if i get an F? what if?

there goes my imagination again, that insecure, panicky, paranoid side of me that i picked up and cultivated to perfection in those competitive years in raffles. wonderful, great, fabulous. i am sooo doomed.

anyway, back to my intellectual collapse. i have a SEA essay due monday. i have a Cyrus essay due thurs. i have a The Prince presentation on monday. i have a Paper 3 (!!!) essay due dunno when. and i have three modules i need to study for the exam for. am i not screwed? am i not whacked? i need a hug. and stay there.
on top of that, i have been having this bad viral cough since last sunday. and its not letting up. its getting me down. and getting worse. i feel i am coughing whatever disintergrated brain matter i have left in this head of mine.

alvin chow kiat was telling me to remember the "lower" people, and be appreciative. you are not the worst. you are not the most stupid. there are other people getting lower grades than you. yeah. sure. now that's going to to make me happy. i dun believe in getting a head of people "worse" than me. i want to getting closer to the people higher than me. this is what years of self improvement messages have done to me. make me stronger. and more stressed.

guomin. yes. i am sure you are just DYING to see what i have to write about you this time you perverted sicko maniac. i was NOT stalking you. i was NOT looking at you. i was NOT imagining all the nasty things i would like to do to you. but i can try, since you want me to. haha!!! i will take more time and effort to stare at you. okay? just make sure you make us laugh you joker.
anyway, dun let the fact that you did less pull ups yesterday get you down. you were probably just tired. just keep at it and we will get stronger together.

alex. yes. i am going to talk about you again haha!!! he's such a nice guy. he stands by his friends (whoever he regards as his friends. he's so picky) whenever they are down. he's great. the all round good guy. EXCEPT (ah ha. here's where it gets nasty) do you know he is so picky? he is choosy about his food? here's are a few example of the things he cannot eat: peanut butter. peanut. cheese. brinjal. raw fish. raw anything. durian. strawberry. strawberry??? but he likes cherry. har??? he's not weird. he's crazy. also, he has impeccable table manners. he hates it when people slurps their food, or munch noisily or chew with their mouths open. that's what i do. that's why he hates me. its hard living with a guy who is overly concerned with grades, food and table manners. that's why he's my friend, cos i need to learn a few things about sitting properly and eating right.

yup that's it for now. now i have to scat and read SEA while coughing.

1 Response
  1. Anonymous Says:

    Dude, like I said, don't stress yourself out!

    I *love* The Prince, so if you need help, I'll be glad to help.

    P/S: No, you won't get an F on your Paper 2.